My prime weakness: throat-hurting American chocolatess

My heart beats fast as I click my Event Ticker app. 102 days more to go before Philippines. I run to take a quick shower before bed, my thoughts running wild, questioning myself as to why I did not start to lose weight sooner? Why did I not take it seriously last August? Three months and what do I expect? This is vintage me. I was once a student who waited for the last minute to submit a project.

I have no competitive bone in my body. It’s never my goal to beat anyone at anything in school. But, somehow, I managed to run for class president twice and won, twice. Had I lost, I would’ve been okay but I’m always like that. The student leader — indecisive but comes through, anyway. That was high school. 15 years ago. I never thought I’d be in this position right now where I talk about high school like it’s the ancient times. I don’t do that! My parents do that! Joke’s on me.

My thoughts are still unorganized. I just took a Benadryl pill so part of me is half asleep already, not to mention, it’s past 1 AM.

I finished more packing for the boxes I’m sending to the Philippines. I drove to Costco once again and bought more candies. I was surrounded by dozens and dozens of American chocolates — the stuff I’d eat just because it’s fun or because there’s nothing else better to eat so I might as well finish a Snickers bar, M&Ms, and dunk Oreos in a glass of milk in one sitting. My point is, I was not tempted to have a bite, not once, not even a Hershey’s kisses, not a single candy, at all. Proud of myself? Absolutely.

Now, there are 102 days left before Philippines and I’m taking baby steps. I haven’t sweat a lot since January 1st, so tomorrow, I must start exercising.

Breakfast today was purple yam, spinach/bacon/cheese/dried cranberries/egg salad for dinner today. I ate so much fiber today, I visited a public restroom and my personal bathroom several times.

Good night, world.

Enjoy the rapid fire that is my brain.

My bed’s calling me now.

Tick Tock, You Ran Out of 24 Hours

See, I can plan my day. It can go smoothly and it can fly by and I won’t worry but sometimes, it just hits you…there’s never enough time in a day to complete your tasks.

I work from home twice a week and today, as part of my New Year’s resolution (a list that encompasses all leftover, unfulfilled tasks from the past year), I woke up early and read my emails and listed down my to-do list. At 12 noon, my inbox has 50 new unread messages, I’m nowhere near completing my to-do list, and most of the work I did had today for a deadline.

I managed to escape from all the chaos at exactly 5 PM and transitioned to my personal tasks. It wasn’t much a task but more like an impromptu visit to Costco. A little past 8 PM and $200 dollars poorer, I come home to wrap gift bags for family and friends to be sent to the Philippines, my hometown. Now, I’m sitting in my bed at 2 AM, wide awake, wondering where this post is going to take me.

Well, I did start drinking more water today. The goal is a gallon a day which is equivalent to 128 ounces. I drank about 60 ounces of water. I tried to use MyFitnessPal but it kept telling me that it’s “offline.” I uninstalled, reinstalled, uninstalled, reinstalled and to no avail. I went online instead and completed my food diary there.

Did I do good? Sure. I had scrambled eggs with tomatoes and onion for breakfast and protein shake for dinner. Awesome, right? Rewind to the part when I was so emotionally up and down at 3 PM and was so hungry, I’m scouring food from the plastic bag closest to my bed. Sure enough, I found a bunch of opened chips I did not finish on New Year’s Eve. I ate a bag and a half of chips, temporarily satisfying my growling stomach, only to regret the whole 5 minutes I devoured them.

My story will not change unless I do something about it. This is only the beginning. Sure, I failed halfway through my journey today but I deserve a medal for not opening a can of corned beef at 12 midnight. I drank more water instead, additional 20 ounces on top of the 60 I finished earlier, and went to bed.

I’m hungry right now. Sure, I can eat…but, I won’t.